Life's a Stitch

I may have mentioned this in a prior post. I used to work with a wise woman, who would say “Everyone has a story. Some longer than others.” Complicated as it is, I’ll try to spare you length.

Sooo, I followed the tracking of our Serrano ham, all 17.5 lbs of it. Presumably it had originated in Spain, maybe over to China, then to Florida where my tracking notice began. Wait a minute, this ham is following our travels! USPS then showed its arrival in Fresno, California, nowhere near our usual California destination. And not anywhere close to our address. 

That’s where it stayed, delivered to an address in Fresno. Scam complete. Yes, this is an official category of mail fraud. A package is sent, not the expected weight, to a completely different address. Tracking is marked delivered, and the sender collects the payment from PayPal. Communicating with the post office supervisor, she confirmed that it weighed 8oz, originated in Florida, it’s terminus in Fresno.

It’s most definitely, not-so-shockingly,  a scham (a scam ham). There were too many signs along the way. A call, followed by a phone call to PayPal, escalated the case to “claim” status. They have contacted Mr. Kenneth Terrel, of Florida, for an explanation. He has some explaining to do. 

Our family holiday treat will now be a prime rib roast, bought at a local grocery store, and safely stowed in our freezer.

Not so long a story afterall. 

Most Canadians know the story of Dave and the Turkey, from the Vinyl Cafe, a radio show featuring sadly gone-too-soon storyteller, Stuart McLean.

 

Our family is developing its own true-to-life bizarre holiday food story. 

 

Background: The name Wilbo is a mash up of our family name with that of Daughter M’s husband’s family name, Wilson. Our son, as emcee of their wedding, told a Lord of the Rings-esque story of the formation of the Wilbo clan. And it worked for our eldest daughter, whose husband is a Williams and son’s girlfriend, also a Wilson, though not related. 

 

The story starts in Spain, while walking our various pilgrimage routes of the Camino de Santiago, where our primary portable protein was the country’s Serrano style cured ham, similar to prosciutto. No nitrates or nitrites, it is aged only in sea salt and required no refrigeration. We raved about it.

 

This year at Costco in Washington we saw whole legs of Iberico ham, on the bone, complete with knife and wooden stand for $99. A non-option for $549, was an upgrade to the cream of the crop, gourmet ham from pampered pigs that are fed acorns. 

 

Christmas will be a meeting of the Wilbo clan, I think 18 of us. C thought it would be a fun treat to have such a ham on the kitchen counter for all to partake. Everyone was looking forward to this unique part of the feast. Alas, when it came time to buy said ham, they were no longer available.

 

One of my children (name withheld) has always had a difficult time releasing expectations; his/her image of how something is supposed to be. When I texted the kids as to the change in plans, who do you think I heard from? Immediately. “Nooooooo…” It was central to his/her vision of this unique Christmas celebration.

 

Reminiscent of the Cabbage Patch doll, talking Alf or stuffed Barney searches of their toddlerhoods (prior to home computers, mind you), I tried to make this Christmas dream come true, this time via google. 

 

Searching for Serrano ham Spain, clicking on shopping, the following price points appeared: $187.95, $179.00, $349.85, $490. These are US dollars, so add a third for a realistic impact on our Christmas budget. Not. A. Chance.

 

Then I saw it. $79.95! Clicking on it took me to a site for a clothing store in China. 

Scrolling down, in addition to mens and ladies wear there was the ham! Several other food options were listed: crab cakes, sea bass, meat pies, St. Louis ribs and Napa Valley cold pressed sesame oil. 

 

I selected shipping and saw that it would be sent via the US postal service within five days. No way that was coming from China. I zoomed in on the image and determined the brand to be legitimate. Oh, what to do? A Spanish ham on a Chinese site delivered from a location in the US. 

 

We looked at each other, coming to the same conclusion, it’s worth the gamble. If it was a scam ham, we’d have PayPal behind us. So I clicked on “place order.” Our child would be happy.

 

This is where the ham story gets fishy. The PayPal receipt came from an account with a hotmail address made up of random numbers and letters. It also lists TWO hams with a subtotal of double the price and a final payment for one.

 

So that’s where we are. What do you think? Is it a ham scam? Goods from a stolen restaurant supplier? An overage of corporate gifts? A Chinese lookalike? Will a ham even be delivered? Might there in fact be two (35lbs!)?

 

Stay tuned. The tracking number says it will be delivered in time for Christmas.

It’s time for our art society’s 60th Anniversary art show. Anyone nearby, please come. Best part, it’s free and right in time for Christmas shopping.

I spent the afternoon matting eight paintings and stuffing cards in cellophane envelopes, which was a feat as we had our second shingles shot yesterday, with accompanying side effects. My teeth were chattering so hard I thought they might crack.

Living in the Pacific Northwest for over half my life, and well familiar with terms for rain, last night's weather report introduced me to a new concept, one that is due to hit within 12 hours. Meet the atmospheric river. National Geographic describes them as rivers in the sky, except that all that water, sometimes 20 times +/- the water contained in the Mississippi River, falls to the ground. 

Why was I unfamiliar with this term? Turns out it's a rebranding of our familiar pineapple expresses as they carry moisture from tropical areas toward the earth's poles. Tis the season to hunker down with soup.

We started with a treat: Bouillabaisse. I asked B if he wanted to head to the dock for some crabbing. Given the heavy weather we decided it was worth spending $16 on a large crab rather than buy bait to hang out in the cold wet with no guarantees. It lasted for two dinners and a lunch.

The instant pot was put to work for ham broth and lentil soup. Half the broth went into our favorite from Spain: Caldo Gallego, which is ham, leeks, white beans, potatoes and a mixture of greens – collards, mustard and turnip greens. 

Twelve minute Instant Pot beluga lentil soup was third in the line up of comfort food.

Combine soup with the great room fireplace located in the middle of everything, kitchen, living and dining areas and we're all set up for a weekend of storm watching. C says, along the coast people pay for this experience. I remind him that we did when we moved here. So worth it, I'm very thankful.

How much of a whirlwind was that? 63 days, six currencies, and 28 beds worth. We rode on trains, boats, planes, buses and cars and walked another 400+k of the Camino de Santiago.

Now it’s home sweet home, which was well taken care of by son, Bryant, who came to the realization that White Rock isn’t that far from civilization after all. That’s encouraging for the future, but for now we’ll stay put.

I left you last in New York. Next stop was Boston, where we met my sister. Her new Jack Russell puppy stole the show; five wriggling pounds of incredible cuteness.

Next stop was Bermuda where our ship was technically the tallest structure on the island(s).

other than the lighthouse:

My previous visit to Bermuda was 42 years ago and of course it’s changed. Half of the hotels have shut down or been repurposed, the bulk of the tourism being provided by cruise ships. Hamilton, the capitol city has lost its quaintness to growth and traffic not deterred by gas at $9.00US a gallon.

A day and a half at sea took us to the Bahamas, a return to our honeymoon, which then was affordable as we participated in a bartering network. We were booked in for a Windjammer cruise on a four masted schooner, not as romantic as it sounds. While we were queued for embarkation there was an announcement: Who here won this trip on a game show or through bartering? Enthusiastic hands raised, the second announcement followed: This isn’t your ship, please follow the staff member to yours. Reality set in as we were guided to something that resembled a single masted tug boat, providing us with an adventure that included bunk beds, cold water, and interesting guests: a pimp and a prostitute, two drug dealers and a Mormon family who travelled with half of their seven children each year. Makes you wonder about that barter system.

Back to this voyage, the next morning we arrived at Ft. Lauderdale where we were spat off the ship at an unreasonable hour – 8:00 am. A long 20 hours later we were home. And now we’re adjusting to life in our time zone. 

We’ve had a week off grid because there is NO way I was going to pay cruise ship prices for unreliable internet. That appeals to the practical part of my nature, just as I’m not spending extra for on-board specialty restaurants for food that comes out of the same kitchen. Bah humbug.

We left Southampton, England in the rain, which followed us across the North Atlantic. Only one day where the seas were 4 meters high and the barf bags appeared in the hallways. I’m ok dosed with Gravol (Dramamine). But it was cool and grey so our time was mostly spent indoors. No suffering there as Celebrity does a good job of keeping guests occupied. My week was spent at shipboard choir practice, enrichment lectures by a broadway historian and LA prosecutor, watercolour class and trivia, in between eating.

We arrived in the pouring rain at Pier 88 in New York.

Seven days on a cruise ship was incentive to don the waterproof hiking boots and walk for miles, starting with the Highline Park, built on the old elevated freight rails of my nearby NY childhood.

Being experienced cruisers we are used to the vicissitudes of scheduling due to variables such as weather, port issues, and mechanical difficulties. Our original itinerary called for a day in Boston followed by two in New York. It was changed to one in NY, a day at sea traveling to Boston, then on to Bermuda.

Reality: 1.5 days in NY due to high winds, which then damaged the gangway, leaving us literally stuck to the dock. Take off another half day for the customs and immigration process. But the time spent waiting on-board for the repairs was relaxing and the weather glorious.

More later. Wanted to let you know we made it across the ocean.

The days have been quite grey, both during our travels and at home. Thank goodness there are still flowers blooming for contrast. 

At the painting group in Denmark, one of the members showed me a photo she took of a sunflower for painting inspiration. I’m sure I took a picture of the same one while out on a walk.

That flower was asking to be painted.

So were the hydrangeas I saw on a rainy day in Spain.

Nine days in Denmark, visiting with nine of C’s cousins, a whirlwind prior to boarding a ship that will take us across the ocean, closer to home.

Chuck’s father was the only one who emigrated to North America in 1924, the rest stayed behind and the family grew. His dad intended the trip to be temporary, a study in different farming techniques, but in the meantime met C’s mother and as they say, the rest is history. He didn’t make it back to Denmark until 1952. This is a photo from that trip, more than half pictured he met for the first time.

Besides the visiting, a highlight of my trip was attending a painting group. This was my painting, partly inspired by the Camino paths we walked and partly the Danish fall colours. 

Wifi is going to be sporadic until we’re back home, but check in because I intend on posting when I can.

How do you walk an average of 20k a day, in the delugenous (OK not really a word, but you get the picture) rain, and stay dry? It’s a matter of personal preference, but here are my priorities in order of preference:

1. Dry feet. I live in the Pacific Northwest and dry feet are a must or i’d never go out walking.  Hiking shoes or boots with a waterproof membrane and gusseted tongues changed my life. Think goretex or the equivalent. There are several brands available and not all are as good as they’re cracked up to be. My worst pair recently were Saucony. Generally I’ve had good luck (three Camino’s worth) with the Salomon brand. I haven’t had a problem with sweaty feet as I use absorbent foot powder and lighter weight Injinji toe socks. In my case there is no tolerance for squishy cold or hot feet.
2. Hiking in a sauna is not allowed. On our first Camino I carried a rain poncho. Although it was constructed of breathable material it sealed in the heat and at times I was just a wet inside as on the outside. I generally wear no rain gear unless it’s very windy, then I only wear rain pants over shorts.
3. The secret weapon? How to stay dry without full-on rain gear? A hiking umbrella, mine is a EuroSchirm Swing Liteflex, made with fibreglass ribs, short handle and EVA hardfoam grip. It comes with a shoulder holster and is light as a feather. It’s large enough to extend over my pack, keeping the contents dry. The best part is the ability to use it hands free so that I can still use my hiking poles. There are many resources online with instructions, just search for “attach hiking umbrella hands free” and pick what works for you. I used Velcro straps and a short length of foam pipe insulation for padding near my collarbone. The only problem was on one day in strong wind where it blew inside out twice, but as it’s made from fibreglass there was no damage. 

Chuck has a waterproof pack, doesn’t like being hot, but doesn’t mind being a tad wet. It’s a matter of priority.

The alarm was set for 7:00am and we woke to pelting rain. We had no choice if we wanted to collect our certificates. In reality I’m the one who wants them, C doesn’t care, but came along for me. I’ve met other couples who experience the same disparity. It is really about the journey, but the certificate is a form of tangible acknowledgment.

 

We arrived at the pilgrim office by 7:30am in the pouring rain. By 8:00 opening there were perhaps 175 umbrelled or be-ponchoed pilgrims in the queue.

We were #73/74 and it took two hours, 75% of the time in a downstairs holding area with chairs, wc’s and vending machines.

Only four people were processing Compostelas. We had some nice conversations with others while waiting (or as the word esperando also translates in Spanish, hoping). But it did strike me while lined up, what’s more painful than walking? Standing lol.

Afterwards we visited the cathedral to complete the pilgrim rituals, then ran errands in the bucketing rain. I have a list of items from Spain to take home: double caldo bouillon,  chocolata taza for chocolate con churro, coffee, spices, and Camino souvenirs.

 

The historic district in between downpours:

A second later the skies opened.

 

We had our last dinner in Santiago at our favourite reasonable restaurant, Casa Manolo. It was pilgrim reunion time as we ran into people we had met from Malta, Australia and London.

 

The evening was spent packing then calling for an early cab so we can continue our travels beyond Galicia. Our little Air B&B apartment was a great fit.

 

 

“The Rain in Spain” will be part of my next post; my thoughts on rain gear and distance hiking.