Life's a Stitch

Throughout my swatching for Marina I’ve left my box of yarn on the floor. I came in yesterday evening to find five skeins of Jamieson and Smith is various stages of shreddedness. It’s funny how the 15-year-old boy, who hardly cares enough for the dog to ever take care of her, can come to her defense when mother is ready to kill her. "It’s not her fault," says he, "you left the stuff out (where has he heard that before) and besides it looks like the "Budda Bone" (a tightly wound bundle of thin string having the effect of doggie dental floss when chewed) she had when she was a puppy; she thought you left her a box of new toys." Luckily second daughter came in at that moment and elected to bail the dog out by offering to re-wind the mass of woolen spaghetti strewn about the living room. Three hours later, what was once five skeins was now ten of varying sizes – all usable. I’m impressed how families can band together in times of knitting crises.

First – big news for the son of a stitch  – his agent just called and he has a part in a commercial! It’s exciting news, his first official job.

OK, so less is more, more is less is the rhyme I’ve made up to remember how to get gauge. If you need more stitches you need a lesser sized needle, if you need fewer stitches you need a greater sized needle. On that note, I started swatching for Marina. The gauge is supposed to be 16 stitches over two inches on 3.25mm (3US) needles. I’m getting 11 stitches to two inches. Holy, if more is less, I’m gong to be knitting this project on circular toothpicks. 

I got up enough nerve to try 3.0 mm needles. Picture those bamboo barbeque skewers. The result? Thirteen stitches per two inches. Still not good enough. I thought that maybe if I used my gauge and knit the smaller size it might work. When I took the total number to be cast on and divided by my gauge, it was still larger than the largest size in the pattern. I apologize if this is sounding too much like math. Here are my options:

1. Use my gauge, but reduce the number of cast on stitches by one Fair Isle repeat to get nearly the right size. I’m afraid what this will mean if I do this for the sleeves as well. Will I end up with bat wings or teeny weeny tubes for sleeves?

2. Try knitting on size 2.75mm needles. Think circular toothpicks. One of my co-workers brought in me in a set of old steel needles on wire cables. She inherited them from her mom. Hopefully her mother’s talented knitting spirits will come through those needles and I’ll be on my way.

These are some of the pre-felted roses of all sizes and leaves for my flower basket bag. Go on over to the knit along site of you’d like more info. I’ve recently posted three times about my adaptation of the pattern to knitting in the round.

Have a good weekend. Happy Victoria Day  weekend to all in Canada.

I’m a few days over 50, but I can still remember the song "I Can Sing a Rainbow" from Captain Kangaroo when I was four. Mind you, I can’t remember where I put my keys from day to day, but I can remember the words to almost every song I’ve ever learned. Maybe if I start singing everything I’d remember more.

That reminds me of another story. One of my children, who will remain unnamed to protect her/his innocence, at age three, used to sing for hours on end. We used to call it opera time at our house.This child had learned many camp songs as Chuck was executive director of a charity that ran the camp where we lived for four summers. One evening I heard enthusiastic singing from the bathroom , "Someone’s pooping Lord, Kumbaya…" Oh I wish I had a recording of it, I still laugh out loud when it comes to mind.

Back to the rainbow, I received a box from Four Seasons Knitting in Toronto. Jo-Anne, with her customary good service, had upgraded my shipping to express post at no extra charge, as her service was not up to her own speedy standards. This is my Alice Starmore Marina to be! I am happy that the colour selection looks more in line with the photo in Woolcraft than the colours called for in the original pattern.

I found out that my  S-I-L has been printing off my blog to share with my M-I-L, who is in her 90’s and lives in a nursing home in Minneapolis. We don’t see each other very much and I’m so excited to be in her life on a more frequent basis. Before I met her, my husband "warned" me that his Mom was genuinely one of the sweetest people I would ever meet. Points for him, I had heard that if a guy is respectful of his mom he’ll be respectful of you. He was right. She is patient and kind, truly lives her faith and has a great smile. My S-I-L is her clone. Hi Mom and Karen! I miss you.

I don’t remember if I listed this in my 59 Things About Me; although I never seem to be at a loss for words I have a deadly fear of public speaking. People talk about the adrenaline rush they get from presentations, but it is exactly that, that I hate. I have enough adrenaline rushing through my veins at any given moment that a milligram more makes me feel sick. I have a hard time figuring out the pleasures of cocaine and speed. This week was one of the only major fund raisers my non-profit agency has sponsored during my employment. It was a Ladies’ Only Golf Clinic and I was elected to speak about the good works of my program. I truly believe in the good that we do, but why do I have such a hard time speaking in front of crowds? I have a masters degree in counselling, I am well versed in the field of phobias, but I admit it – I HATE PUBLIC SPEAKING!

Complicating factor – we were informed of the untimely passing of a friend whose funeral took place at the same time as the golf clinic. Although Al was 83 he experienced an unfortunate accident (a fall) causing his unexpected but supposedly peaceful death. What makes it more incredulous is that we had dinner with him just last week. Al was a lifelong committed golfer, and as I was unable to attend his memorial, I tried to be brave in his honour while I spoke to a banquet room full of golfers.

Our friends from Seattle came up for the funeral and stayed with us. We did a lot in Al’s honour these past couple of days. We remembered his fondness of wine and drank a fair share; we talked of our conversation with him two weekends ago, about how on the night they met, Fran, his lovely wife of over 60 years, literally danced him under the table, and we danced; we reminisced about his love for good food and we ate lobster. (Hey Vancouverites – if you want a rare treat, try Lobsters Only, a supplier to restaurants, but they sell to the public on a cash basis – $11.75/lb).  We didn’t need an excuse to do any of the above, but it was fun remembering Al and the good times we had together.

Oh yeah, we knit. I’m 75% done with my flower basket bag:

I think sometimes that some afflictions in blogland are contagious. The Harlot has her issues with Mr. Washy and Karen,of Needles and Wool fame, has just reluctantly replaced her second set of front loaders. I am replacing my eight year old Kitchen LemonAid washer and dryer after repairing the damn thing almost once per year. As if it’s consolation, everyone in the business of w&d’s tell me that they’ve never heard of anyone having such problems with that product. If fact Kenmore, which is Whirlpool, which is KitchenAid, is the most highly rated brand on the market. Well, poo-flonk (as my son says), replacing a washer and dryer rates right up there with new roofing, brakes, clutches and mufflers. I bought that top of the line set thinking that was the last time I’d be shopping for a w&d for a long time.

Off I went. I found a terrific deal on a Maytag Neptune. I really paid attention when I read Karen’s blog about her experience buying one, reading about class action suits, and changing her mind. I really read that, but why did I make the same mistake? It was SUCH A GOOD DEAL! And besides, they couldn’t possibly be selling the same model in Canada. Guess again. It was the exact same model. Is Maytag exporting to Canada because they can’t sell them in the States? A good friend called Maytag and they assured him they are not; that the problem has been solved. But the bad PR combined with my recent lemony experience sent me running to Sears where I purchased their considerably more expensive set. The upside is that they are stackable and are larger capacity machines. My daughter is of the opinion that the chances of getting a lemon twice in a row are slim when you buy the highest rated item.This solution, however, presents a new problem – I hear you can’t felt in a front loader. Any suggestions? I’m feeling sorry for my washerless self as I watch Mt. Laundry grow higher than its usual tree line self. And how come all those good sheepy and wool festivals seem to take place on the East Coast? Thought I’d throw that in to this whine fest.

I’m ending the week not on a knitting note, but on a painting one. This is the second in the tree series we have been working on in my watercolour class. I am really enjoying this experience.  Have a wonderful weekend.

At my watercolour class the teacher told a story about his Dad, who asked him "If you had two wishes what would they be?" My instructor remembered his Dad’s wishes, " to always have a $20 bill in my pocket (it was probably the 1960’s) and to remember everything I’ve learned." How well off we would be if we could remember everything we learned.

Although Gracee isn’t the most intelligent dog, she does remember everything she’s learned. Each evening, in anticipation, she parks herself at the top of the steps about the time Chuck is due home from work. I’m not sure this is about memory or that a dog can smell her master from a great distance.

I’ve been on a roll recently teaching myself new things. I’ve been wanting to knit an Indian cross stitch scarf with Koigu. I saw a picture if it on the Keyboard Biologist’s blog. She has a link to a site for purchasing the pattern, but the link was a dead end. The designer had retired. I e-mailed the K.B. and she told me the pattern was free with the purchase of two balls of Koigu at another site. You can’t order online through this site, you have to e-mail and wait for a return call. It’s been a couple of months with no response so I got to work figuring it out myself. I found two versions of the Indian Cross Stitch pattern in materials I already own, one an encyclopedia of stitchwork that I’ve had since college days, the other is the current Vogue Knitting, where there is a scarf using the same stitch, but it appears to be knit widthwise instead of lengthwise.

I heard a discussion happening behind me at a knitting group. I felt like I was in fifth grade.They were referring, in just loud enough voices, to my prolific knitting and that I mustn’t have a life. What I don’t have is TV. I knit for 15 minutes at breakfast, 15 at lunch and I average an hour to an hour and fifteen each night. Some days I don’t knit at all and sometime I put in three hours. I’m sure this would be way less if we had TV. We have TV’s, just no cable and living way up the mountain as we do, we got nothing without cable. I made the decision not to hook up the cable when we moved into this house. At the time Bryant was pretty young and once argued with me quoting Bart Simpson as if he were a real person. That pretty much sealed my decision. It’s been most difficult for Chuck who used the TV as video valium. It has the opposite effect on me as I am a news junkie. We’ve recently discussed under what circumstances I’d consider having TV again. My stipulation would be that there be no cable in the bedroom. The conversation didn’t go very far after that so maybe I’m safe for awhile.

Knitting the flower basket bag has also taken me back to school years. Ninth grade math to be exact. Math didn’t click for me until college years and then I loved it. This Vogue knitting pattern, however, at times makes as much sense to me as algebra did in high school. It’s a series of failures and slow successes. Maybe if I put it away for a few years it will click. I’m not giving up, but I am accepting that this is a fine example of a process knit. I am glad for on-line knitalongs. They give me encouragement to persevere; I couldn’t possibly be the only one who doesn’t get it. I remember that feeling from school as well.

If you’re a blogger, don’t you wish sometimes that you could contact some of those people who arrived at your site through strange Google searches? Like the person tonight who googled from Japan "solution to dining philoshoper problem."  The internet has loads of info, but Life’s a Stitch is the only site that came up when someone wanted to solve the issue of a philosophizing dinner guest.

It’s not too difficult to guess what the people behind these searches were thinking: "dirty blog photo albums," " girl with puffy nipples," and "cute young things." But what made them click on a knitting blog? There is usually enough of a description to indicate what they’re in for.

Two recent searches left me chuckling, however, for their randomness. How about "roast bear cook time oven" or "Hong Kong tushy?"

It just occurred to me that some of you regulars may have come to me through one of these searches. No problem, you obviously like some aspect of knitting and you are totally welcome to continue reading, I’m just concerned about the prospect of you "inhaling mouse turds" and I hope you figure out "where to pee on a train."

Went to the mail this morning and I’ve been happily RAOK’ed! Inside a package from Knitter’s Review was a simply stated gift card: "Happy RAOK," a box of knitterly note cards and the piece de resistance:

Thank you! It’s amazing how things like this happen at a good time; recently life has presented us with some dropped stitches and this was a happy way to mark the fact that they’ve been picked up and things are clicking along in their not so usual way. Much appreciated!

Something smelled pretty rotten in our van the other day. First is started out smelling reminiscently of nail polish remover. Then it was a nose stinging tang and I knew I had to figure it out. Ah ha! A runaway can (I use the term loosely since they are now made of cardboard, no longer the metal ones I used as hair rollers in high school) of orange juice concentrate. It fermented to the point of bursting, seeping into every possible crevice of that vehicle’s floor. After a thorough cleaning we’re into smell control. We are a house of extremely allergic people, especially when it comes to artificial scents. Luckily we have discovered some baking soda pucks, the name of which escapes me. When we bought our used Jetta they were miraculous in eliminating the watermelon scented pine tree air "freshener" the previous owner had hanging from the mirror.

On the subject of scents, why would anyone use a food scent to mask an unappealing odor? I was in Wal-Mart and noticed toilet paper holders with an apple cinnamon scent. I’m sorry, I don’t want to mingle bathroom smells with something I like to eat. How about you? They also had vanilla ones recently. Excuse me while I puke into my lemon scented toilet.

On the knitting front these are various bits of my flower basket bag. Notice, however, that there are no photos of the bag itself; having been frogged yet again. I decided to edit the pattern to make the bag slightly larger, to do the handles with a corking tool, and to save myself time by knitting in the round. There’s probably a reason it’s not written to be knit in the round. It is a very confusing pattern by itself, much more so with knitter inflicted amendments.

Chuck update: Good news – the IV bag comes off today, and will be substituted with oral antibiotics, but the PICC line stays in until he is infection free for a while. And it’s back to work on Friday. He expressed pleasure in anticipation of losing the pump he has been carrying around. It was like a large, heavy Tamagotchi strapped to him, beeping insistently when it needed care or refilling. Some of us women can relate to this concept after suddenly being delivered of a weight of the nine month variety.

Raise your hands, how many of you like to go shopping for bras? I bet you that number decreases with age. I read that the average bra size is 36C and that this is increasing. Ten years ago it was 36B. What’s going on? Is it because of the aging population? Too many kids on hormones? Too much McDonald’s? I ended up buying a Wonderbra. Who names these things? It’s not the push up kind of Wonderbra, but very sturdy looking pale green thing with a rhinestone right smack in the middle. I think it was the rhinestone that hooked me, so to speak. As I get older my foundations are getting more practical. Right, practical – a rhinestone bra. Moving right along into the too much information department, I used to buy bras for what they looked like, now I buy them for what they do. In other words, do they do their job of holding things up properly? This wasn’t an issue for me ten years ago. Must be all those McDonald’s breakfasts.

I’ve finished Jeannie’s shawl. It was a quick satisfying knit, the perfect gift project. It’s a garter stitch triangle, starting with two stitches and doing a yarn over after the first stitch of each row. It took way less yarn than the bias shawl, making it a bit more economical with two fewer skeins of yarn.